The Poop: Part Deux (it's funny cause 'deux' is like 'doo', which is poopies!)

Aug. 23rd, 2005

My parents and I were sitting around the table discussing the poop while a midget league football game was occurring at the school. The pooping was more likely done by the high school team as their practices coincided with the appearance of the poop, though both age groups were peeing on the property.
So then my younger brother walks in and says that there were some football couches walking around the pine trees smoking cigarettes (since it was half time, and you're not allowed to smoke on school property). It was decided that the confrontation should occur. My parents ran out to catch the couches, and I slyed out to try to watch it all gone down. That's when we found Lucy, our 16 year old dog, in the arms of a midget foot ball player at our door step.
The Poop: Part Deux (it's funny cause 'deux' is like 'doo', which is poopies!)
She apparently had followed the smells of hot dogs being at the vending booth and gone up to the game. She looked really uncomfortable being held since she's very old and no doubt arthritic.
That really put a damper on things though, because it made us look bad for letting our deaf blind dog wander up to the game. The confrontation still occurred, but I didn't get to witness it because the Lucy thing freaked me out so I got the hell out of there.
My parents showed the Midget league coaches the piles of poop and they appeared to be shocked.
The next day when the high school kids were practicing my dad went up and talked to the coach, just as he was summoning all the kids to have their mid-morning motivational talk. He pulled the coach aside (which is good because I'm sure he would have scared the poop out of the players) and discussed the piles on the lawn. The coach was all like "Well they didn't give us a porta-john this year til today, but I'll address that with the players right now!" So I guess they won't be pooping on my parents' back yard anymore.

Very anti-climatic. I was hoping for a fist fight..  or what I think would have been the responsible thing to do (although I've got some skewed views)..have the football team clean up their shit piles.

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